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https://d1y502jg6fpugt.cloudfront.net/25778/archive/files/1dd475ff33f2d412ff0fec26d2a0f5ab.pdf?Expires=1712793600&Signature=jP%7EPnJjTsC3KaMKkRF6a9P76cfum4q107GIICWYdKZQXCSn2kpBsq5HdvaQfAe10yoSb1ij45y11KJzNykCy4RCnLWvliysDwcrZgGt58XyktXsxpBtKak-tF5vtjQkYjNSGubOConhCbP2hAL4q8bFwcOYlGeGvYx8dZYp9bwc6Ha1P9QWj1PvYoQKDp-vjbKni7V-Gh1PNoljBG0wOWncEdiM-Gp7S0i8ErPLos41G%7E380mR8qVlT0xE7Jo-mNYZbWC0qOlQtZoQicP2uY4XybWklnt7XOK1EMnpalgq0S-KSayFL5xVtGLjVH919QZT%7E9H3MBpHhR2bOOF-4PqQ__&Key-Pair-Id=K6UGZS9ZTDSZM
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REALITIES.”
A CONTRIBUTION TO THE PEN AND PENCIL SOCIETY.
’%
\
* ■'
BY
P.
A.
TAYLOR,
M.P. '
*
’ ..
PUBLISHED BY THOMAS SCOTT,
MOUNT PLEASANT, RAMSGATE.
�TURNBULL AND SPEARS, PRINTERS, EDINBURGH.
�“ R E A L IT I E S.”
------ *------Aubrey House, Notting. Hill, W.
February 5th, 1871.
Dear Mr Scott,—You are quite welcome to reprint
my little jeu, if you really think it worth la chandelle.
It was of course never intended to leave the MS. form in
which it was placed in the basket of our Pen and Pencil
Society; but an American lady who happened to be
present, liked it well enough to send the MS. to a
New York Paper, in which you saw it.
The texture is too flimsy to stand cutting about in
the endeavour to make it more presentable, so that if
you do anything with it, it will have to be just as it
stands.—Yours truly,
P. A. Taylor.
AM informed by Pen and Pencil, with a certain
harsh inexorableness of tone that something I must
produce this evening, or—incur a sentence too dreadful
to be contemplated, no less than that of ostracism
(perhaps ostracism for incapacity should be spelt asstracism).
Well, what are the words ? Realities and drifting.
Very good; then I’ll take both, for the most character
istic element that I have noted of realities is that they
are constantly drifting.
Wishing to start from an undoubted basis, I asked
a friend, before sitting down to write, what exactly he
understood by realities, and he replied, with the air of
a philosopher, “ whatever man, through the medium of
I
�4
“ Realities"'
his senses, can surely realize.” The conclusion I draw
is, that there is some inextricable connection between
realities and real lies. In which I am confirmed by
Johnson, who traces the derivation of the word reality
as from real.
Sir John Lubbock, in his “ Origin of Civilization,”
under the heading of “ Savage Tendency to Deifica
tion,” states as a fact that il The king of the Koussa
Kaffirs, having broken off a piece of a stranded anchor,
died soon afterwards, upon which all the Kaffirs looked
upon the anchor as alive, and saluted it respectfully
whenever they passed near it.” At a glance it occurred
to me, this is a reality well worthy of being brought
under the notice of Pen and Pencil. Will it not
furnish, thought I, material for their philosophers, and
mirth for their humorists, and surely an excellent sub
ject for their artists. But is it true ? Ay, that must
be my first discovery. Who shall hope to palm off
doubtful realities upon Pen and Pencil, without de
servedly drifting to disgrace ?
Without indecent boasting, I believe I may assure
this august assembly that I have probed this matter to
its very root; the whole truth is in my hands, and
shall be faithfully presented to this critical company.
I shall be excused from detailing my method of ex
amination ; time would fail us were I to make the
attempt; suffice it to say that I have brought all
possible modes under contribution, and many more,
and that not a single fact has been set down unless
previously tested by a wild flight of imagination.
Upon principle, too, I decline to say how I have
arrived at the realities of the case, lest truth should
suffer through disapproval of my process.
If I say that I have telegraphed direct, some wretched
caviller may observe that he never heard of Kaffir
wires. I may have conversed with the ghost of the
wicked king of Koussa Kaffir through the medium of
Mrs Marshall, but some joker—how I do detest the
race—might object to my plan of marshalling my facts.
I may have “ asked that solemn question ” of the leg
�“ Realities. ”
5
of my loo-table, which does not by any means “ seem
eternal,” something after the fashion of Ion. I may
have caught the little, toe of Mr Home, as he was
floating in mid-air, and so found my information, as
honest debts should be paid, on the nail. I may have
—but no more—1 respectfully decline to communicate,
to-night at least, aught but the ascertained realities.
It is true, then, that a stranded anchor was thrown on
the shore of Koussa Kaffir; that it created wide-spread
wonder and enquiry as to its whence, its wherefore, and
its whither; that the king, being of an enquiring
mind, often examined the anchor, pondered over its
shape and its materials; that one day, testing this last
with too much energy, one fluke was quite lopped off.
His majesty was pleased with the result, although it
did not seem to do much towards solving the difficult
questions connected with the strange visitor; but it
was afterwards generally reported that some of the
wisest of the Kaffirs had shaken their heads three
times, and had remarked that if anything should
happen they should doubt whether it was not for
something.
Something did happen. The king that night ate for
his supper forty-four ostrich eggs, besides two kangaroos
and a missionary. It was too much for even a Kaffir
king; he was seized with night-mare, raved of the
weight of the anchor on his chest, and died.
The effect produced upon Kaffir public opinion, and
the Kaffir press, was startling and instantaneous. The
king had broken the anchor; the king had died—had
died because he broke the anchor; that was evident,
nay was proved—proved by unerring figures, as thus :
the king was fifty-five years old; had lived, that is to
say, 20,075 days; to say, therefore, that he had not
died this day because of his daring impiety was more
than 20,000'to one against the doctrine of probabilities.
The anchor, therefore was a power—was a devil to
be feared—that is, a god to be worshipped; for in
savage countries there is a wonderful likeness between
the two. Thus was born a religion in Koussa Kaffir.
�6
a Realities.”
Divine honours or dastard fears were lavished on the
anchor a priesthood sprang up who made their account
in the Kaffir superstition. They were called anchorites.
They were partly cheats, and partly dupes; but they
made a livelihood between the two characters. They
fixed the nature and the amount of the sacrifices to be
offered, and the requirements of the anchor were in
remarkable harmony with the wants of its priests.
Natural causes, too, were happily blended with super
natural. The anchor was declared to be the great
healer of diseases. For immense sums the ministering
priests would give small filings to the diseased, and
marvellous were the cures produced by oxides and by
iron; never, in short, was there a more prosperous
faith. The morals of the people, I grieve to say, did
not improve in proportion to their faith. An anchor
that is supposed to remit sins on sacerdotal intercession
is probably not favourable to the higher morals in
Koussa Kaffir.
But a trial had to come upon the anchor-devil and
its worshippers. Under it it must collapse, or passing
through it as through the flame of persecution, come
forth stronger and brighter than ever. Which should
it be 1 It was an interesting spectacle. Let me finish
my story.
There returned to Koussa Kaffir a native who had
voyaged round the world since he had left his native
land; he had seen and had observed much • he was
well acquainted with anchors ; had seen them in all
stages and under all conditions ; he knew their use by
long experience; he had handled them. One time
his vessel had been saved by its stout anchor, another
time he had had to save the ship by slipping his cable
and leaving the anchor at the bottom; he had never
known an anchor resent the worst usage; he would
not worship this old broken one. Some thought him
mad, some wicked ; he was called infidel by those who
knew his mind, but for a long time he followed his
friends’ advice, and said nothing of his awful heresy.
But this condition of mind would hardly last for
�“ Realities. ”
7
ever. Travel had improved his intellectual force, as
well as given special knowledge about anchors and
other things ; he began to lament over and even to
despise the folly of his race ; he burned to cast off some
at least of their shackles of ignorance and superstition.
“ How shall I begin,” cried he one day, “to raise their
souls to something higher, while they worship that
stupid old rusty anchor in the sand?”
His soul began to bum with the spirit of martyrs
and reformers. “ I will expose this folly ; I will break
to pieces their anchor-devil, and when they see that all
is well as it was before, they will begin to laugh at
their own devil, and will have their minds open to a
higher faith.”
But first he would consult his friends; if possible
obtain their sanction, and act in unison with others.
He met with no encouragement. One gravely rebuked
him for his presumption and conceit, and produced a
long list of eminent Kaffirs who had bowed before the
anchor. Another found in the absurdity of the anchor
faith its best evidence of solidity. It was, he said, a
faith too improbable for a Kaffir to have invented ;
any fool, he added, could believe a probable religion,
but it needed a superior Kaffir to swallow this. Some
put their tongues in their cheeks (a vulgar habit
amongst the Koussa Kaffirs), and said : “ Silly fellow,
we know all that as well as you do, but the anchor is
a profitable anchor, and as needs must, you shall be
one amongst the priests.”
Again, others said : “We, too, have our doubts, but
as a political engine we must retain our anchor. How
should we keep down the lower orders ? How restrain
our servants from pilfering without its influence and
sanctifying power. The fact is, that in our complicated
social system all society depends upon the anchor.”
“ Between ourselves,” one added, “ if heaven had not
sent that particular anchor some of us think we must
have sent to Woolwich for another.”
But the only arguments that caused him any hesi
tation, and which did give him some pain, were from
�8
“ Realities''
certain women who implored him not to destroy their
anchor idol. “ We cannot judge,” saidffine of these,
11 between your arguments and the conclusions we •
have been brought up to reverence. The anchor may
not be a god but only a symbol, but how beautiful a
one ! Does not the anchor save the ship ? And are not *
our own lives, too, like the storm-tossed vessel? That
anchor is associated with all we have felt, suffered,
prayed for. Destroy that symbol, and you wound
and endanger the deepest element of religion in our
hearts.”
Finally, one very intelligent friend said to him with
much solemnity: “-Rash man, forbear! . Stop while
there is time in a course that may bring down ruin on
the state and on yourself, and for the doing of which
you can have, as a rational being, no temptation what
ever. I grant you, you may be right, and the rest all
wrong; but what then? We can'know nothing of
the matter, and you may be wrong, Now, anyhow,
we are on the safe side of the hedge. If the anchor be
a devil he may do you harm, and if he be only a bit of
rusty iron,* you will be none the worse .for a bow and a
grimace.”
The rash man was immovable. Doomed by the
infernal gods to pay the penalty of having lit his
Promethean torch at Woolwich dockyard, armed with
a mighty hammer, and followed by an awe-struck
crowd, he fell upon the anchor, and with one mighty
blow, struck off the other fluke. It was his last!
Inspired by religious zeal, the Koussa Kaffirs rushed
upon him, and in the sight of the outraged anchor beat
his brains out on the beach. It was observed that his
friend who liked to be “ on the safe side ” threw the
first stone, and the advocate of public morals was the
next; after that they rained too thick to tell who did
the most.
Meantime the anchor of Koussa Kaffir will be
worshipped for a thousand years, for has it not slain
the only two men who dared to question its authority!
�
Dublin Core
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Title
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Victorian Blogging
Description
An account of the resource
A collection of digitised nineteenth-century pamphlets from Conway Hall Library & Archives. This includes the Conway Tracts, Moncure Conway's personal pamphlet library; the Morris Tracts, donated to the library by Miss Morris in 1904; the National Secular Society's pamphlet library and others. The Conway Tracts were bound with additional ephemera, such as lecture programmes and handwritten notes.<br /><br />Please note that these digitised pamphlets have been edited to maximise the accuracy of the OCR, ensuring they are text searchable. If you would like to view un-edited, full-colour versions of any of our pamphlets, please email librarian@conwayhall.org.uk.<br /><br /><span><img src="http://www.heritagefund.org.uk/sites/default/files/media/attachments/TNLHLF_Colour_Logo_English_RGB_0_0.jpg" width="238" height="91" alt="TNLHLF_Colour_Logo_English_RGB_0_0.jpg" /></span>
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Conway Hall Library & Archives
Date
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2018
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Conway Hall Ethical Society
Text
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Pamphlet
Dublin Core
The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/.
Title
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"Realities": a contribution to the Pen and Pencil Society
Creator
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Taylor, Peter Alfred
Description
An account of the resource
Place of publication: Ramsgate
Collation: 8 p. 18 cm.
Notes: From the library of Dr Moncure Conway. Printed by Turnbull and Spears, Edinburgh. First published in a 'New York newspaper' p. [3]. Tentative date of publication from KVK. The full name of the Society was: Plymouth Friends' Pen and Pencil Society. A satire.
Publisher
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Thomas Scott
Date
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[1871?]
Identifier
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G5494
Subject
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Literature
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<a href="http://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/mark/1.0/"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/p/mark/1.0/88x31.png" alt="Public Domain Mark" /></a><span> </span><br /><span>This work ("Realities": a contribution to the Pen and Pencil Society), identified by </span><a href="https://conwayhallcollections.omeka.net/items/show/www.conwayhall.org.uk"><span>Humanist Library and Archives</span></a><span>, is free of known copyright restrictions.</span>
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application/pdf
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Text
Language
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English
Conway Tracts
Reality
Xhosa (African Peoples)